Friday, April 25, 2008

Pumpernickel, please

“All the bread is hot. Would you like a wrap?”

That is one of the most confusing things anyone has said to me all week.

Now, I know I’m not much of a cook. I’ve never baked my own bread so I will admit I might be a little ignorant on all the culinary processes necessary to achieve yeasty yumminess. I have, however, probably eaten way more than my share of loaves and rolls. I have eaten so much of it, in fact, that I have become a connoisseur. That’s just a fancy way of saying I’m a bread snob. I don’t really like sliced white bread all that much anymore. I’m all about the dark breads with seeds and grains in them.

I also think the bread making people that supply buns to fast food restaurants try to fool us by putting sesame seeds on plain white bread rolls to make us think they have added class and elegance to a hamburger. Hmmmpf, I won’t be fooled to lower my standards any more (I’ve already sunk to eating the white bread bun - - isn’t that enough of a compromise?!!) I usually pick the sesame seeds off, or trade my top bun for my husband’s bottom bun. I end up with two bottoms and no sesame seeds.

So, when someone tells me the bread is hot, I think that’s a good thing. Mmmmm, fresh out of the oven. The aroma. The butter-melting warmth.

Apparently, there are times “all the bread is hot” means it is not fit to eat.

Scott and I had a long day and had not had a chance to eat dinner until late. As I said, I’m not much of a cook, especially when it’s late in the day and I’m hungry. We headed to Subway for a sub sandwich. The greeting we received…

“All the bread is hot. Would you like a wrap?”

I asked the young woman to repeat what she said. She did, “All the bread is hot. Would you like a wrap?”

I had to ask, “Is that a BAD thing?”

Someone else behind the counter piped in with a little more explanation about hot bread being too hard to chew. Well, my goodness. I never knew.

I guess the greeting sandwich artist and I both assumed the same thing….that I knew more about bread than I actually did.

Then Jesus declared, "I am the bread of life. He who comes to me will never go hungry, and he who believes in me will never be thirsty.”
John 6:35

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