Saturday, February 23, 2008

Am I Really That Old?

A couple of weeks ago I must have been in either a nostalgic mood or just needing a little change. I took a ring from my jewelry box that I rarely wear. It‘s a silver spoon ring. My Aunt Mary gave it to me when I was about 10 years old. I think she gave each of my sisters one too. Spoon rings were really popular back then. At 10 years old, the ring fit my index finger. Now it fits my ring finger.

The day I wore the ring, one of my friends noticed and commented on it. She was very interested in the silverware pattern used to make the ring because it was the same as her mother’s silverware. As I began to tell my friend the origin of my ring I said something about “this old thing” and commented that I’d had it over 30 years.

Am I old enough to have held on to something for THIRTY years?!

Oh, my. I don’t feel that old.

But as I get older, I realize that as we age, life begins to be defined more by what we can’t do than by what we can do. Even though I’m only in my 40s, there are some things I just can’t do like I used to be able to do.

My parents are in their 80s. They have been very blessed by God to be in the position that they’re in at this time in their lives. They live close to family. They have a new house and no mortgage. They have their ailments but they’re in relatively good health. Still, I’m sure they have days when they think about how in the world they will manage if things change. They probably think about what they will do if they can’t take care of themselves any more. When and if that happens, I’ll do what I can for them. Even then, I won’t be able to do it like I want to. I won’t be able to meet every need they’ll have.

Even though I’m only in my 40s, I think about that for myself as well. Who will be there to care for me when I just can’t care for myself anymore? Just what will I do? How will I manage? I’ve always been strong; how am I going to cope with weakness? Will it humble me in ways that will leave me embarrassed or ashamed?

I have no idea what all the many things will be that I’ll no longer be able to do in 40 or 50 years, if I live that long. I have no idea if there will be anyone I know or love surrounding me then. There is no guarantee. Except one.

Jesus will be there. Whatever is left undone, he will complete.

Whatever I can’t do for my mom and dad, He will finish.

Whatever I can’t do for myself, He will fill up the space.

My trust is in Him.

Even to your old age and gray hairs I am he, I am he who will sustain you. I have made you and I will carry you; I will sustain you and rescue you. Isaiah 46:4

1 comment:

Steve said...

Wait until you reach 50!! I enjoy reading your blog. Reminds me of some good old days.